the walk

the promise

If you wait for me then
Ill come for you
Although Ive traveled far
I always hold a place for you in my heart
If you think of me,
if you miss me once in awhile
Then Ill return to you
Ill return and fill that space in your heart
Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
Ill find my way back to you
If youll be waiting
If you dream of me like I dream of you
In a place thats warm and dark
In a place where I can feel the beating of your heart
Remembering Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
Ill find my way back to you
If youll be waiting
Ive longed for you
and I have desired
To see your face
your smile
To be with you wherever you are
Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
Ill find my way back to you
If youll be waiting
Ive longed for you
and I have desired
To see your face,
your smile
To be with you wherever you are
Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
Ill find my way back to you
Please say youll be waiting
Together again
It would feel so good to be
In your arms
Where all my journeys end
If you can make a promise
if its one that you can keep,
I vow to come for you
If you wait for me
and say youll hold
A place for me in your heart.

affirmation

w o k e
i n
t h e
m i d s t
o f
t h e
n i t e
t r y i n g
to
r e a f f i r m
i f
i
w a s
t h e r e
w i t h
y o u
o r
i f
y o u
w e r e
h e r e
w i t h
m e

i a m h e r e o n m y o w n

your call

no expressions left unsaid
no gestures left undone
no prayers left unsent

i am about done

it's your call

the state of being

to

1) zerorize expectation
2) no one-some
3) pray harder

25 years leap

Each one has their own interesting stories.
I'd like to phrase them as fillers of the leap. It cud be by choice that the fillers are reflective on the individual's face.

And the face reflects the state of mind while a picture paints a thousand words.

One could be alone yet happy with it, the other may have everyone by herside - but still searching.

I just hope i'm real..

difference

there's a world of difference between 'wanting to' and 'obligated to'.

clothes in the closet

feeling like some ...

my kerongsang thor

and the sun shines...

Family @ Eid 2008

Mak and her siblings

Plus the children

Almarhum Abah's clan

Qayyum and ex-classmates

Makan ...

My cousin's merisik @ mak's

Makan @ merisik










Hence the up 3kg!!!

Semoga Ramadhan datang lagi for me..

feeling sad as my cycle parked-in today.
sad tapi tetap bersyukur i managed the last 24 days with taraweeh, and the last 3 nites with qiyam.

ya Allah - tubna ilallah, warojarkna ilallah...
terimalah ibadah hambamu.

i amused myself at www.yearbookyourself.com

1960


1968


1976


1994

the next

1. The greatest dignity to be found in death is the dignity of the life that preceded it.

2. Good health doesn't guarantee anything, the wisest thing to do is to live everyday as though it will be our last.

3. There is always a dignity that proceeds from the life well-lived by preparing for the next world, and from the acceptance of one's own death.

4. Death makes more precious each hour of those we have been given, it demands that life must be useful and rewarding.

5. It is not in the last weeks or days that we compose the message that will be remembered, but in all the decades that preceded them.

6. Unique circumstances of death will be granted to someone with a unique personality.

7. The race of men is like the race of leaves. As one generation flourishes, another decays.

8. Death is easiest for those who during their lives have given it most thought, as though always to be prepared for its imminence.

9. It is possible to die resigned and reconciled, patiently and tranquilly, having experienced life more fully because of the constant awareness that life may soon come to an end.

10. The utility of living consists not in the length of days, but in the use of time, a man may have lived long, and yet lived but little.

from Mak @ my four zero

pillow talks

Dangerous - kalau hati tiada iman...

Always and Forever

Happy birthday to my always, from your forever...
May Allah grant you all your wishes and doa.

sepatu baru

seolah di perhentian
menanti
setiap langkah
berhenti
langkah
henti lagi

menanti
menoleh
kiri dan kanan
kiri ke kanan?

lelah
tak bersudah
datang dan pergi
datang ke pergi?

redhalah
perhentian ini
adalah dunia mu
nokhtah sebuah perjalanan dulu
permulaan jalan baru

menapaklah
dengan sepatu baru
setiap langkah kau sendiri

Ramadhan Al-Mubarak

Ya Allah, thank you for blessing me with yet another Ramadhan.
Beri aku kemudahan untuk mengecap sebolehnya kelazatan Ramadhan Mu.

Hopeful this is not the last...

eggs in a basket

sepatu baru

seolah di perhentian
menanti
setiap langkah
berhenti
langkah
henti lagi

menanti
menoleh
kiri dan kanan
kiri ke kanan?

lelah
tak bersudah
datang dan pergi
datang ke pergi?

redhalah
perhentian ini
adalah dunia mu
nokhtah sebuah perjalanan dulu
permulaan jalan baru

menapaklah
dengan sepatu baru
setiap langkah kau sendiri

THE RING

was cleaning up the place yesterday evening after sundries shopping. awa's nagging that the place is full of nicknacks and clutter is getting into me. planning to rid most of the things which are of mainly of the past. hmmm - perhaps sell 'em on ebay - plan next week.

was almost done sorting things out & cleaned the place when i noticed i missed my ring. frantic! i looked for the normal places where i use to park it - not there.

OMG - i lost my ring.

found it half an hour later. was the longest 30 minutes in my life... with noone to turn to, all sorts of imaginable thoughts and aftermatch playing in my head. i have never in my life revisit my trash!

the feeling is simply indescribable! the loss - strange that it includes that as tho i fail him - felt even more distance - even more all alone.

oh no! i've come this stage this fast... ??? thots, thots, and lots of thots...

for the emotional and physical loss i've just experienced, i'm determined to have the ring in only 3 places -
1) on my finger
2) by my bedside in the wooden case
3) by my dressing table in the marble case

non-nego!

lessons
- everything has its place/places
- not to take things for granted
- when things turn into routine and automated, they become less special / gets less attention and become less important

Nikmat

each second, each minute, each hour, each day, each year - is a nikmat from Allah, enabling us to prepare our self for Jannah. other worldly matters are mere temporary. to remember the priority, to live & cherish each moment ...

190808

40!

Dengan nama Allah, Yang Maha Pemurah, lagi Maha Pengasih.
Selawat ke atas junjungan Nabi Muhammad SAW dan ke atas ahli keluarga dan sahabat baginda.

Ya Allah,

Ampuni dosaku.
Berikan hidayah dan keberkatan dalam hidupku, bimbinglah daku, tingkatkan keimananku. Jadikan aku insan solehah, yang dapat bersama suamiku dalam mencapai jannah. Jadikan aku anak yang dapat membahagia dan mendoakan ibubapaku. Jadikan aku ibu yang dapat menjadikan zuriatku anak-anak yang bakal mendoakan aku & suamiku..

Ya Allah, beri kejayaan kepada kami dunia dan akhirat.

Amin. Ya Rabbul 'alamin.

distance

i am ok without him.
i would definitely be ok-er with him.

190708

O Allah, bless this union with hidayah and barokah.

190708 - images

xxx

many a times my thoughts have flown unbidden
many a times i have not found words enough to express
how special a place you hold in my heart
you have made my life a dream come true
sweetheart, i am glad i found you..

----------------------------------------

i'm so glad you're part of my life. i love you more and more each day xxx

Life Goes On

Back to life, and everything else seems more important. Life goes on..

Reborn

Alhamdulillah.

Awa is done with Hajj. MAy Allah accepts all your ibadah and bless you with Haji Mabroora.

Praying that you are all so refreshed - renewed - reborn...

Amin.

missing you

missing you much
could almost feel
my heart slipping out
venturing
to where you are

wishing we're together...

7-24 December 2007 - AWA @ Hajj

Labbaikallaahumma Labbaik

It's a form of His rahmat on you - to be amongs His selected guest.
Go for it - soul searching, soul cleansing and come back - reborn!

May Allah bless you with a smooth journey and a mabrur Hajj.

xxx

Some up-lifting words!

: Trust in Allah and we will get through this together
: Please keep your head high we are nearly there!

: keep training I want you easy to lift

5-Dec-2007

2 years ago - today, received my talaq. Life has been tough - but alhamdulillah it gets better.

i wonder

a: love you tonnesssssssssssss. you know that don't you

n: aaaa....... :) some times i do, other times i wonder